[MOD: this is an answer to a previous version of the question]
I'm not sure I believe your answer. Perhaps I'm missing something though.
Let $T = X_{ij}Y^{ij} + \lambda (X_{ij}\delta^{ij})$, which is your original function plus a Lagrange multiplier for the traceless constraint.
Extremize by setting partial derivatives with respect to the entries $X_{ij}$ to zero:
$0=\frac{\partial T}{\partial X_{ij}}=Y^{ij}+\lambda \delta^{ij}$
For entries where $i=j$, this is $Y^{ii}+\lambda =0$, which yields the condition that all diagonal entries of $Y$ are equal, not that $Y$ is traceless. For the entries with $i\neq j$, we recover $Y^{ij}=0$ as usual.
