Summary
There are semigroups of finite essentially arity which are not strongly abelian. This follows from my original answer and a result I cite in the addition below that I have not read in detail.
Added. Here is a self-contained answer. Take the semigroup $S=\langle x\mid x^3=x^4\rangle$. Then consider the term $t(x_1,x_2)=x_1x_2$. One has $t(x,x^3)=x^3=t(x^2,x^3)$ but $t(x,x)=x^2\neq x^3=t(x^2,x)$. So $S$ is not strongly abelian. But the essential arity of $S$ is $3$ since the value of any word of length $3$$\geq 3$ in $S$ is $x^3$.
Original Answer
A finite semigroup $S$ has finite essential arity iff it is locally trivial, that is, $eSe=e$ for all idempotents $e\in S$.
Pf. First suppose that $S$ is not locally trivial. The either $S$ contains a subsemigroup isomorphic to the 2-element semilattice $\lbrace 0,1\rbrace$ with multiplication or it contains a non-trivial group $G$ as a subsemigroup.
In the first case, the variety generated by $S$ contains the free semilattice on any set (i.e. the power set under union with singletons as free generators) and so the term function given by a word on m-letters depends on all those letters. If $S$ contains a non-trivial group $G$, then it contains a cyclic group of prime order $p$ and hence vector spaces over $\mathbb F_p$. But then again the term function depending on any word in m-letters depends on all letters by considering a vector space of dimension m.
So finite essential arity implies locally trivial.
Conversely, if $S$ is locally trivial, then it is known that $S$ satisfies an identity of the form $$x_1\cdots x_myz_1\cdots z_n = x_1\cdots x_mz_1\cdots z_n$$ and so any term operation coming from a word depends only on at most $m+n$ variables (the prefix of length $m$ and the suffix of length $n$).
In particular, no non-trivial monoid has finite essential arity.
Added. If I understood correctly the results of Stepanova, A. A.(RS-FARE-IMC); Trikashnaya, N. V.(RS-FARE-IMC) Abelian and Hamiltonian varieties of groupoids, Algebra Logic 50 (2011), no. 3, 272–278 then a locally trivial semigroup is strongly abelian iff it is an inflation of a rectangular band. Most locally trivial semigroups are not inflations of a rectangular band. If $S$ is an inflation of a rectangular band, then $S^2=S^3$. But if one takes the semigroup $\langle x\mid x^3=x^4\rangle$, then it is locally trivial (hence essentially finite arity) but it is not strongly abelian.