Regarding the $BN$-pairs approach, I must say I don't recall details, having done very little work on these things in past 15 years. In a nutshell, one cannot hope for "real" apartments, etc., so one instead looks at amalgams of parabolic subgroups. Instead of a definition, let me giev you a toy example, $GL_4(2)$ and its Borel subgroup $B$ (taken to be the upper-traingular matrices, say). Then you have "minimal parabolics" $P_i$, i.e. subgroups generated by $B$ and $e_{i+1,i}$, for $i=1,2,3$ (here $e_{ij}$ denotes the matrix with 1 at position $ij$ and on the main diagonals, and 0s elsewhere). Then, you get maximal parabolics, $P_{ij}$, generated by $P_i\cup P_j$. This is what is called a rank 3 amalgam (as you have 3 minimal parabolics).
Your geometry then consists of cosets of $B$, $P_i$'s, $P_{ij}$'s in the whole group and in each other. The amalgam is now the set-theoretic union of $B$, $P_i$'s, $P_{ij}$'s, and you can study its universal completion, i.e. the biggest group where is can be embedded into. By tweaking the groups which can arise as $B$, $P_i$'s, $P_{ij}$'s, one covers more cases than buildings, and tries to stay away from infinite universal completions for ranks at least 3.

